Social decline: continuing
So I ran into a friend today. It was nice, and also novel, because I do relatively little social interaction these days and seem to avoid it more than I ever did (case in point: I had seen another friend earlier in the day and I walked past quickly in a panic that she might see me and I might have to talk to her and I was scared I wouldn’t know how to do it without (a) offering to buy her a drink/clean her house/carry her children by way of pre-meditated over-compensation for my social ineptitude or (b) using the word ’subaltern’). Anyway, I was so overwhelmed by the niceness and novelty of seeing this friend that I leaned in to give said friend a hug and a kiss, then realised he hadn’t assumed the hug and the kiss, so I pulled back, by which point he realised I was going for the hug and the kiss, so he leaned in and had to stretch twice as far to deliver an awkward kiss as I gigglingly hugged him.
CHRIST SIMON.
I have become socially illiterate. HELP.